let your vision ferment

patience in the process

artist link

the desire

In late 2022, I wrote a Substack post talking about feeling stuck with my writing, and how the only way through was to just force myself to create. I publicly committed to posting a short essay a week, and a longer essay each month.

In 2023, I wrote a (now deleted) Twitter thread about how I wanted to post more, and that I was committing to tweeting every day for the next three months.

I failed at both, and I failed quick. I think I wrote maybe two essays for the first goal, and maybe a week of tweets for the second. In both cases, the writing was gruelling, a product of me trying to coercing myself to do the work.

Then, in last May, something clicked into place. I actually started enjoying tweeting. I started tweeting a lot. Then, I started writing essays, publishing 27 over the rest of the year.

What happened?

on flow

The simple answer is: I was finally ready.

Before last May, I knew I wanted to write, I knew I wanted to share my thoughts with my world, I knew I wanted to be prolific… but I didn’t quite know what to express, and I didn’t quite know how to express it. And then, rather suddenly, I did.

This is how the creative process works. We don’t just come up with a vision and then go bring it to life. We don’t just force something into existence.

It starts with a few hints, here and there, and a quiet yearning. That yearning builds and builds, over weeks or months or years, and eventually spurs us to action. We make a few attempts but these are inevitably paltry, disordered, halfhearted. We might not yet believe in our own vision, or we just haven’t found our feet yet.

But it keeps building. Something is organizing itself in our subconscious. Some process is bubbling away in the depths of our mind, fermenting. When it’s done, we know. We have a sudden clarity, a sudden energy. And just like that, we get to work.

on forcing

But it’s easy to be impatient with this process. We get a glimpse of an idea and we want it now. We imagine the type of person we’d be if we could bring it to life. We imagine the admiration we might receive, the sense of belonging.

So we try to rush it. And it feels terrible. It feels like running uphill in thick mud. Nothing works right. We lose confidence in our own abilities. We can’t make any consistent progress, even though we know we should.

This is treacherous terrain. It’s tempting to throw out the vision. It’s tempting to give up on the whole fermentation process. Paradoxically, that can help, because it’s not actually up to you. If a vision is strong enough, if it’s actually a calling, then it’ll keep going, regardless of your conscious decision to give it up for good.

So we stick with it, or we don’t. And eventually, sooner or later, the process completes. Done. Fermented. Ready to serve.

And then it’s easy. Then it’s fun. Maybe not always, maybe not forever, but our muddy hill is now a stroll up a mountain path. Arduous, but satisfying. Intimidating, but beautiful.

When it’s ready, you’ll know.

how to ferment

If you asked me to replicate what changed for me in May, I couldn’t do it.

If you asked me to just name what changed, internally and externally, in a way that finally allowed me to create content in the way that I wanted to… I still couldn’t.

The only explanation is: I wasn’t ready, and then I was.

We cannot force a vision into being before it’s ready, and we also can’t force it to be ready, or try to speed up the fermentation process.

Alas. If it could be so, the most disciplined people among us would also be the most creative, and that’s simply not the case.

But that doesn’t mean we are powerless.

Our most creative selves embody a particular energy. The version of you who is actualizing your vision has a certain aura about them. They act a certain way, and they feel a certain way.

We can use that energy as our compass. Imagine the version of you who is bringing your vision to life, and imagine how they feel. Then, notice when you feel even a hint of that energy in your day-to-day life.

Notice what conditions bring you closer to your most creative self, and seek to amplify that.

We’re able to create when we become the type of person who is ready to create, not before.

That’s our job as artists (and we’re all artists, in this way). To pay attention to certain energies, certain ways of being, and move closer to them.

There’s nothing more you can do. There’s nothing more you need to do. And you can start right now.

With love & appreciation,

Scott

P.S. if you’d like to help clarifying your vision and its required energy, check out my 1:1 coaching. 🍊